“I was walking along the road with two friends. The sun was setting – the sky turned blood-red, and I felt a wave of sadness. I paused, tired to death. Above the blue-black fjord and city, blood and flaming tongues hovered. My friends walked on. I stayed behind, quaking with angst. I felt the great scream in nature. So I challenge the Mona Lisa and Whistler’s Mother!” –Edvard Munch
I didn’t crack the tooth after all (see 2016-05-14), but just bruised the lignin by biting wrong and jamming it into the socket, and that’ll fix itself. Dr. Mattson DDS explained the situation, deftly applied a little whirring tool to a couple of teeth in strategic locations and– voila! Now I can talk as fast as I want to, forget entirely about where my teeth are closing, and just shovel out the words and thoughts, and the esses /only very rarely/ make that fingernails-on-a-blackboard shriek instead of doing it every time I don’t put spare clock ticks into consciously driving the machine. It’s a weird, liberating sensation. You can hear the effect throughout this show, which rockets along through fair and foul material alike, with barely suppressed glee bubbling along the edges. The Human Holiday plays for about 40 minutes, starting at midnight-fifteen (3 hours and 15 minutes in), Elly Cooney called and read a story, and still I read a seven-hour show in six hours.
Really, I feel like Absolute Evil in Terry Gilliam’s /Time Bandits/, where Evil exults about how now HE has the map (“…and the day after tomorrow, the world!”). Actually I’ve always sort of identified with that character. At least he tried; at least he did that.
It’ll wear off, or rather become the new normal. Except– a generous lot of things have been going right for me lately, some of them my own doing, some not. Download the show and I’ll tell you about it.
Guy Clark died, and that’s not good, but everything can’t be good all the time, can it.
Anyway, here are links to a few not necessarily radio-useful but really worthwhile items that I happened upon while putting the show together, found mostly thanks to the fine websites listed to your right.
When the New World was new. I’ve been back there; it’s different now. Everything seems smaller.
National Anthem singer at Trump rally accompanied –or rather accommodated– after the fact, by pianist. Amazing.
You need to hear it without the piano? I quite understand.
Cut from commencement speeches.
The brain map.
“Some readers found embryology too difficult. Here a bewildered listener, his mind blown, flees from a lecture to an inn.”
525 million years of devolution in a flipbook.
“To accentuate the mouth you can use four sounds: Oooh! Ow. Wow! Gee.”
Even better than the Catholics’ get-ups, and kaleidoscopically head and shoulders above the Mormons’ magic underwear.
Róisín Murphy – Ten Miles High.
Immigration to U.S.
Spanish to install.
They use something like this to invent titles for people on committees in nonprofit corporations.
See you in Anaon (or Uffern, Peklo, Tuonela, whatever).
How slow light is. If you could actually see behind you while traveling at the speed of light, which you can’t, and if all the planets were lined up in a line parallel with your path, this would be a look behind at the sun from the point of view of light leaving it. (It takes 3 minutes just to pass Mercury, 8 to pass Earth, 43 to pass Jupiter.)
Deep electron microscope zoom into a mosquito’s eye.
Shielded and unshielded locks.
They fight crime.
Pish-tosh, said Hieronymus Bosch.
Puppy mill. It looks like a method of no wasted food, but wait a few hours and then look out on the front lawn and all the neighbor’s lawns. (On the other hand, the dogs will eat all their own processed product up eventually, too, so the whole process is really more like the concept of a cat factory.
(Get rich quick scheme: Cat factory.)
Cat watching horror movie.
This is what happens when you turn on the lights in this restaurant kitchen. Call me old-fashioned, but I think that’s too many rats.
Great. What could go wrong? Also, whether it goes wrong or right, every single shot is as expensive as building and staffing a high school or feeding every poor person in America for a week.
“Oh, my God, I hope they sanded that.”
List of nicknames used by George Bush so he could remember who people around him were.
This thing clips on the glasses of a person with poor vision, who then simply points at any words he wants to read (in a book, on a sign, on a pill bottle, on teevee) and the thing reads what he points at aloud to him in his ear.
This thing that lets you carry on an ordinary conversation in real time with someone when neither of you understands the other’s language. (Like the thing just above, in the future this will be part of your ear-clip or glasses-clip or contact lens or brain implant that is just your phone and computer and flashlight and everything else you need.)
And hypnotism posters circa 1900.
“They jump on each other and scuffle, then one will bounce away and the other will do its little victory preen. They used to kill each other, but now they hunt in packs because most of the ones are from the same brood. I occasionally see outsiders– my ones are more brown, and other ones turn up that are a little darker or lighter; I get these black handsome ones turn up and I think all my girls are like, ‘Oh, look at you,’ and all gather round when he does his fancy dance.”
Scott Peterson phoned about half an hour into the show and talked for twenty minutes about the bizarre Mendo Art Center special board meeting last week (he says there’ll be another one on the 25th, in the main gallery), and about a born-and-raised perspective on Mendocino Village development over the years.
I had an exciting/dismaying below-the-gumline tooth damage event the night before the show, and I was worried I wouldn’t be able to make the proper embouchure on the mic to read aloud for all those hours, but it turned out to be not too much trouble to deliberately almost-but-not-quite close the rack to say the approximately 15,000 ess, ex, cee and zee sounds involved. Just now I listened to bits of the recording, throughout, and can’t tell the difference. In fact, except for the places where I forgot and clamped down and so (!) winced in the middle of a word, no-one would have a clue if I hadn’t brought it up. For content, anyway, it’s a pretty good show, if I do say so myself. (Ow.)
And here are links to a few not necessarily radio-useful but really worthwhile items that I happened upon while putting the show together, found mostly thanks to the fine websites listed to your right.
Just because it isn’t happening here doesn’t mean it isn’t happening.
Coffee cures cancer. In twenty minutes.
Stay for the drum solo. (Or skip ahead to it. 1:45.)
The juggle drummer.
Other musical instruments waiting to be juggled.
The definitive /Still Alive/. (Jonathan Coulton’s /Portal/ (game) credits-roll song, but here including Dorit Chrysler on theremin!)
Inside a hardcore labor-intensive kaleidoscope sweatshop.
MacIntosh vacuum tube amplifier construction.
This is a real bug. This is not a Fimo bug.
Lovely photography of American warplanes that settled in and for Iceland.
Need a good cry?
Salt in water. Much more interesting than it sounds. Increasingly interesting. (10 minutes)
The 32 types of anti-feminism.
“The lumpier the fruit, the more organic it seems.”
Stay curious, George.
Judge says all blackish folks are child-rapists and it makes her vomit just to think about them. Some people have a problem with this.
“History is not all awful. There was this one time, way back, when a thing went okay.”
Canada is on fire. Of the many forced to evacuate, these people had a security webcam (with sound) in their living room, so they could watch from distant safety as their home was destroyed. And so can you.
Historical Russia, bright, sharp, close up and in natural color.
A dark minor-key remix –both audio and video– of Smashmouth /All Star/.
“It’s all I ever do in this crummy joint, is win, win, win.” This link came from an article about Donald Trump.
How to make a decent hunting bow out of 50-cents’ worth of plastic pipe.
The shape of things to come.
How opera works.
The effect of opera on penguins.
Topo globe of Mercury.
The recent Mercury transit in time-lapse, with the video cycling through a variety of different wavelengths of light.
A demo of a new kind of guitar. It does all sorts of things, including going /vuuuUUUV/.
“It was his foot’s time.”
Cats and brushes. They hate them.
Traditional maple-leaf singing.
The first five slow, off-putting episodes of /Dollhouse/ cleverly fan-edited into one decent, coherent hour, to set you up to jump to episode 6 and enjoy the rest of the –it’s said– really quite good series.
“All that night I heard the bird circle while I was eatin’ fish and watchin’ Urkel.”
Benicio del Toro colors.
All the greatest model train sets in the world.
“100% brain function.”
And the most delightful mini Rube Goldberg device yet. Because magnet balls, and the springiness and reversibility of magnetism.
“It is impossible to create a parody that thousands of idiots won’t mistake for the real thing.”
And here are links to a few not necessarily radio-useful but really worthwhile items that I happened upon while putting the show together, found mostly thanks to the fine websites listed to your right.
Perpetuum Jazzile – Africa. (It works great on the radio, but it’s so much better to see also.)
How nature says don’t.
“Get your hands off my breasts!”
…and a little pipe organ the same guy made.
Oh! Oh! Oh!
Fair is fair. Not fair is not fair.
“This is not time to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism.”
So, bribes, then.
Prime. This number is against the law to have, even if you’ve only written it on a piece of paper. People have been arrested for wearing a t-shirt with the number printed on it.
“And, with that, somebody has completely said all the combinations of all the names.”
An owl in a sink. That is all.
Homeopathic hospital. “Time of death: 3:34-ish.”
I can’t wait.
Koka’s beat machine.
You say cicada and I say cicada.
And Max the Piano Player wants this bebraided young lady’s lips read and the lyrics transcribed. Help him out.
“All the world will be your enemy, Prince With A Thousand Enemies. And whenever they catch you they will kill you. But first, they must catch you, digger, listener, runner, Prince With a Swift Warning. Be cunning, and full of tricks, and your people will never be destroyed.” –Frith
Scott Peterson called at 9:30 (half an hour into the show) and we talked for an hour about the glaring financial chicanery involved in Mendocino County’s nonprofit corporations in general and the ones that run the Coast Hospital and KZYX in specific, who seem particularly prone to roll over under the leadership of perpetrators of what some might call obfuscatory ethical jiggery-pokery. If that’s all you’re interested in, because you’re a freak for that sort of thing, click here instead. Obfuscatory ethical jiggery-pokery– it’s so fun to say. Try it. Yes, now. If not now, when? If not you who?
And here are links to a few not necessarily radio-useful but really worthwhile items that I happened upon while putting the show together, found mostly thanks to the fine websites listed to your right.
The infamous industrial safety film /Will You Be Here Tomorrow?/
A very short film with a fall in it, but a fall into the sky. And Slinky-brand spring toys.
Another reason why, even if elections are not rigged from the get-go (which half of all Americans polled say they are), voting might not do you any good anyway because of a curious glitch in collective reasoning.
John Oliver speaks about Republican-values Republicans.
Fourier transforms explained so that even /I/ can understand it. Now that I do, of course, I retroactively always understood it, and people who didn’t were all idiots.
Fourier toy! Play with this!
New way of getting five-times-higher-rez pictures of Mars’ surface by successively integrating camera orbit views. Every time the camera flies over, the picture gets sharper.
Kung fu motion visualization.
As well as traces of cocaine, there are as many as three thousand different /kinds/ of germs on every piece of money. Also: if you feed a timid mouse a brave mouse’s shit in pills, it becomes a braver mouse (and tries to bite the scientist when he goes to feed it more shit pills).
How the whole world runs on looting the Congo.
A journalist chronicles his own descent into Alzheimer’s.
Saints of science and reason. Including everyone’s favorite: Nikola Tesla.
Everyday objects amplified into numinous unrecognizability.
Some kind of porn, but what kind exactly would you call it? (My eye is drawn to the tips of the claws. It can’t possibly play the instrument; it must be about rip the strings off, that’s all. And the woman like that. Very much.)
Shake it, B. Yeah, that’s the way.
River on fire. (Sing to the tune of /Ribbon of Steel/.) Odd and impressive, but keep in mind how easy and cheap it would be to fake this for propaganda effect by opening two or three small flammable gas cannisters, weighting them and tossing them in. Also, if it’s not a trick, and if in fact they are fracking nearby, they doing so because there’s a lot of flammable gas in the ground there, and lighting it on fire as it escapes might have worked regardless of the fracking, the same way people used to drill for oil where they saw it naturally seeping up through the ground anyway. I don’t know.
Further NASA high-rez solar flare videos.
So /not/ flat, then, but like a re-cap tire press, and with angels. Got it.
A few shots from space. And there’s a link to see more.
Kind of a drugged train trip. Interesting.
House and garden train set. With cat and, later, dog.
Watch a man mess with an old modular analog synthesizer. This is the way it used to be done.
“We’ll demolish him with our ten-percent-less-despised advantage!”
The California KKK’s choice…
…but not the Grand Imperial Wizard’s choice.
Blind taste test with a real blind person.
Frightening chemical ingredients of an egg.
Kylo Ren outtakes.
I loved the film /Me and You and Everyone We Know/. This is only one of the reasons. “You are crazy and you are making me hot.” Later on, when the woman meets the child in the park and discovers she’s been writing back and forth with, you know, a child, her reaction is so calm and sweet. I hope I’m not ruining this for you; I’d really like you to get and see the whole movie. Miranda July is a genius.
“The science just isn’t in yet.”
“When I hear the shells and the bombs I head straight toward them.”
Falls like a brick, eh?
Moving pictures from 1864. /1864!/
And Nilla Pizzi. What a lovely voice.
“He says that blood and guts don’t bother him much anymore. What he hates is responding to single-vehicle fatal car accidents (typically drunk drivers). It’s the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere and my brother has to climb into a ditch and peer into a vehicle he knows contains a dead body but the radio still works and is blasting. He says that mariachi music is the creepiest.”
Before the show, to make sure everything was working properly I played a woman’s audio essay about how ancient giant technologically advanced people, possibly from another planet, froze themselves in stasis chambers (she gets it right a couple of times, then it’s “status chambers” the whole rest of the time, and “status giants”) for tens of thousands of years, and have been dug up by the Global Elite, awakened, imprisoned and tortured for information. She has an interesting accent. She sounds like Madeline, who used to operate the box office at Helen Schoeni Theater. Here’s that.
“The planet is actually the bottom of a glass filled with orange juice, wasabi, half-and-half and tomato sauce, while the moon is a small pancake and the nebula is formed from water, coffee, food coloring and more half-and-half.”
HD time-lapse auroras recorded from space –real ones not made of cat hair, liver paste and/or food coloring but rather of Earth’s near-vacuum upper atmosphere fluorescing under bombardment of charged particles from the sun.
Street booth cotton candy maestro.
Fractal flow chart. (Scroll down to the bottom.)
Gridshifting, and explanation. With video.
Which hybrid house? I got Ravendor.
Which Shakespeare? A decider chart.
Ian’s guide to lacing.
Musical swing project. With video.
Iron & Wine: The Trapeze Swinger.
She’s 90, but /who/ is she. Really.
“Enough is enough, Stephanie. I need to know who’s a good boy. My patience has worn thin.” Everyone’s favorite seems to be Bread Dog. Or Soap Sculpture Dog. Or Beestung Dog.
“New nurse Kristi can throw a urine bottle at 160 kilometers per hour.”
Bad lip reading. Hillary and Bernie. Dalump-ta-duuuuhm.
It’s a cookbook!
Yuba plays the rhumba on the tuba.
Huckaby plays bass on Free Bird.
Al Jolson sings /You Made Me Love You./
Communter train. Drunk young white man calls old black man a nigger over and over. Old black man sits there and takes it for fifteen minutes, then stands up and kicks the shit out of him, kicks him off the train, and sits back down. Video begins right at the satisfying part.
Trump at half-speed. Though, let’s be fair: everyone sounds drunk played at half-speed.
“What is that whipcord resilience that lets the weaker sex play half the night then bob up clear-eyed, ready for the next morning’s work?”
Bendito Machine, Part 5(!). I only ever saw Part 1, thought that was all there was, and look!
Hospital volunteer woman freaks out. Tense/fascinating.
A test. You know who you are.
Nana! Good for you!
Catalogue from Belcher Mosaic Glass Co. (1886)
Some things it seemed like a good idea at the time to spend all our money on.
Enter, then click and slide. You can also move the map, and embiggen and ensmallen it. Just imagine all the stupid fighting and killing over all those arbitrary lines. (See Bendito Machine, Part 5, above.)
Further hot Israeli army girls.
Didn’t think you were fat? You are!
Harvard Sailing Team: Boys will be girls (2010). “You guys wanta split an ice cube or something?”
Girls will be boys (also 2010).
Can toddlers represent themselves in court?
Puff the Magic Dragon was written by the man who invented active electronic 3-D glasses.
Alby the Racist Dragon.
Blandly the cross-eyed bear.
Tripmunks. (3 hours.) (Today is, in fact, the anniversary of Doctor Albert Hoffman’s accidental discovery of the effects of LSD.)
Endless ominously triumphant epic music to just leave playing day and night in one earbud as a background to your life. Not necessarily superior to mariachi music, but it might suit your endeavors better. Excelsior.
Cute and, soon, extinct.
What a giant water lily looks like from underneath.
Literally making an entrance.
I in the sky.
Just a little sponge soaking up information about the world.
“He laughed all the way into orbit.”
He’d be a /little/ less creepy if they’d just close up the back of his head. And stop patting his shoulder and saying how much they love him. And not hold the baby close enough to put its hand in his mouth. Or kill him by switching him off. These things are not under his control.
World quickly corrupts innocent chatbot…
…whose brothers are already flying around blowing shit up and constructing more of themselves.
Fatality counts of mass stampedes.
I love this. It explains so much. Backwards bike.
Also cool. /Why/ persistence of vision works. Our vision system is slow, so image burn and a kind of cellular video memory buffer compensates, and we can enjoy a movie.
We’ve all got one.
That cute foreign person you might fall in love with? Is a spy. (Warning: video autostarts.)
“A drawing of the head of a conceited simpleton.”
The explosion of the Spanish flagship during the battle of Gibraltar.
And if you have a few hours, you can watch the Titanic sink in real time. (Or just skip ahead to about 2:30:00.) (Or 2:39:10, when “There are about 1,500 people still onboard.”) Interesting minimalist soundtrack.
Several opinions on the subject of Jupiter crashing into the Sun.
Also meanwhile (a little perspective):
Don’t look any further.
“Fidgee fidgee fidgee. Boodle boodle boodle.” –Captain Haddock
Ah, the wonders and conveniences of modern technology. The streaming computer at the station somehow changed settings, which resulted in real-time warbly and clicky autotune-sounding pitch change going out on the air and to web listeners, and the not-clicky not-warbly recording of this 7-hour show showed up as being 8 hours and so of course lower in pitch. The Jews have a word for how I felt when I discovered all this. But I used CoolEdit to simply speed up the recording by a ratio of 48000:44100 and saved that. Result: the recording you click (above) to get for yourself is the proper length and plays at the proper speed and sounds pretty good, which is nice, because Stuart Cohen came and played music for over an hour, starting at –hmm– a little before 11, so if that’s the only part you’re interested in, skip ahead to an hour-fifty into the show.
He took his skin off for me.*
Austin Granger, K’nexpert.
That’ll show her.
The space elevator.
All possible prior art.
Cars. I like the red one best. It looks like the model for the original Disneyland Autopia go-carts.
“Applesause, bitch.” Movie after-kill lines.
Videos about a waterjet cutting tool smoothly cutting household objects in half.
Vote and vote and vote.
Fish out of water.
A pleasant sport.
And a cat twisting in air. Because it can.
*You’ll recall They’re Made of Meat.
“You’re a ghost driving a meat-coated skeleton made from stardust, riding a rock hurtling through space. Fear nothing.” –Alan Watts
Crusade against Cthulhu.
We could have been exploring the galaxy by now. Start with the chart, stay for the video slideshow.
Bear has rock.
Bunny has critic. “I GOT a life! My life is with the LORD JESUS CHRIST, not with some SATAN’S BUNNY!”
A style of animation I first saw in the opening credits of HBO’s /Carnivale/. Fascinating.
America! Land of wonder and mystery!
Just hangin’ out with the kitch-posh racist yahoos in their white Cadillacs and pope hats, toastin’ marshmallows on the scrap-lumber crosses, and shootin’ their black metal penis-substitutes at tin cans.
A video demonstration of the (comic) power of new-age-y energy. (Energy shield master humiliated.)
You used to be able to watch this sort of thing on teevee after school. Sometimes they were on roller skates, bashing each other with their hips and elbows and getting each other in headlocks and ass-over-teakettle crashes. That would sell, again, now. Betty is still alive; they could get her involved.
Math teacher famous for his dotted line technique.
DARPA wants you to submit your homemade bomb and weapon designs. Really.
“I’m-a build-a the towers myself. I know I’m-a gonna do something big, so I’m-a gonna do it myself. I’m awake all night. Because this all was-a my idea.” Also, notice the theme music, which predates /The Twilight Zone/ by years.
Won’t you come home, Bill Baily?
Shakespearean sonnet generator.
Plug in the numbers and find out how many people you’ve indirectly had sexual contact with.
You might remember the Segway company owner died by his own Segway. He Segwayed right off a cliff.
…Well, I read where someone wrote in favor of a woman’s bid to rent out Segways on the Coast Trail, because the writer said he knew crippled veterans who would really like that. And I wondered if people too crippled to walk would really do well to ride a rented Segway on a trail. So I looked up “YouTube Segway crashes”.
Where the Nazis hid the pianos.
The Bobs’ /White Room/ in 2006, with only one original Bob, but they’ve still got it. They’ve still got it.
When the Beatles were Flight of the Conchords.
A little more about how the DNC cheats for Hillary.
Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.
Scroll all the way up and down to /Trump or dead chicken/.
“DON’T YOU DARE CARVE HAPPY FACES!”
Performance art has finally been embraced by the mainstream. The JC Penney period flower skirt.
The aliens’ purpose.
Remember your giant suitcase made out of sheetrock and painted purple? Well, here’s what an art school graduating project looks like today.
Exhibition of speed and power: 300,000 HPH (hotdogs perhour). (Though it doesn’t go to mentioning the ammonia and other non-edible substances added, just the “herbs and spices”.)
The right tool for the right job.
Do you not want this? Who would not want this?
…Here’s where to buy one. $55.
Impressive teaching ability. This is exactly the sort of person who should be teaching in schools. And not just on cars, but on every subject. This is how to do it.
Sex Nun of Dune.
The latest League of Steam musical production. (15 min.)
Meryn Caddell’s /I’m Knitting Myself A Hat/.
Racist hairstyle deciding social algorithm.
Tornado recorded from upstairs window of house tornado destroyed. Camera guy lived, barely. His wife didn’t.
This is just like almost everything on the MCN Discussion listserv, except it doesn’t have anything about glyphosate or vaccinations in it.
The United States frequency allocation chart.
It’s BabyMetal, bitch! (Warning, nauseating camera crane swoops.)
“Son of a bitch! Nuts to that goddamn line; I cannot remember it!” “Ah, God dammit! You can give this to Sadie Friar! I can’t do this!”
Robot Scarlett Johansson. Kind of hot, except for the seams. And the creepy eye-corners.
What? What do you see? It’s the ghost hand again, isn’t it?
And I’ve been recommending this movie for years –In the Realms of the Unreal, about Henry Darger and his life’s work that was discovered and revealed only after his lonely death. You can watch the whole thing on YouTube for free:
“Anger is madness. It is devoid of self-control, forgetful of decency, unmindful of ties, persistent and diligent in whatever it begins, closed to reason and counsel, excited by trifling causes, unfit to discern the right and true. But you have only to behold the expressions of those possessed by anger to know that they are insane.” –Seneca
I need to tell you: Adam David Jones, who was in several Mendocino Theater Company plays up to last year –you’ll remember him as dangerous, conflicted, creepy Eddie in Arthur Miller’s /A View From the Bridge/, and as wunderkind political fixer Stephen Myers in /Farragut North/– is in trouble in real life and he and his family need your help. Last Saturday night someone or someones attacked him with what must have been R-rated-horror-movie-level violence and dumped him in a parked car in Harrisburg and left him for dead. He was discovered and taken to hospital, where to save his life doctors had to remove part of his skull to relieve the swelling of his brain. So there’s serious damage outside and inside. His mother’s with him 24 hours a day; she says he can make sounds and he can squeeze her hand a little, but he has yet to open his eyes.
There’s a crowdfunding page set up to try to make it just a little easier for him when he gets up, whenever that turns out to be. Go there and help with a little money. Please. http://tinyURL.com/HelpADJones
Welcome to Marwencol. One man’s project to make sense of personal catastrophe.
When I was a little boy, Shari Lewis and Lamb Chop were the most wonderful thing in the world.
And, of course, dinosaurs. Who doesn’t love dinosaurs?
Dig this crazy 1906 chess magic-square crossword puzzle mashup thing. And not just dig but boggle and/or plotz.
Wonderella solves the day again.
Hip-hop horse race.
How the four-click pen works.
This is us.
Something you didn’t know about prime numbers.
“It’s a nice chob, but da smell, it’s not zo nice.”
A neat game.
“I can see my house from he–yaAAAHGH!”
A quiet electric motorcycle that converts in about five minutes to a paraglider and flies. If you are like me, when it lifts off like a feather wafting up into the air you will jump up and shout /YES/, because this is very close to flying in dreams, and this is possible. The main thing is, it’s electric; it sounds like an electric fan, not like a giant chainsaw in the sky.
Jonathan Coulton’s /Mandelbrot Set/.
And, for when the inevitable happens, what to have done already and what to do next.
“If your dry Peas boil hard, a two Pound Iron Shot put with them into the Pot, will by the Motion of the Ship grind them as fine as Mustard.” –Benjamin Franklin
The lady in the tutti frutti hat.
The chicken will not run. The eagle will. The chicken will guide you safely through all the alleys of the world. The eagle will drag you down the dark alley and kill you.
That’s why you need one of these literally creepy gaze-activated dresses.
So St. Patrick is kind of like the Paul Bunyan of Ireland. “The Oillipheist heard that the saint would be coming for him next, and in his panic, he sliced through the land and created the River Shannon.”
The Paul Bunyan of bowling.
How to make an extremely potent homeopathic cure for piss.
Infinite fractal pizza.
Fractal engine toy.
You dirty, lousy /fractal engine toy!/
So cool! Even more like in the movie /SimOne/.
Places in Studio Ghibli films. (Scroll down.)
I love it that people do things like this. He could easily have been killed, but he wasn’t; he’s okay. The ‘chute needs to be bigger, and he needs to be better protected inside the rocket, but it’s a wonderful project.
It’s not true than no-one can explain these costumes. How hard could it be?
I think this is just a fantastic-looking motorbike. It’s a modified Honda 50 (or 90). I’m not sure how safe it is riding a bike with the seat higher than the handlebars, but imagine what it looks and feels like when you’re on this thing. You can’t see the wheels or the motor or anything. You’re riding on a little putt-putting rocketship three feet off the ground. It’s /the future/ in the thrillingly hopeful sense of Athena the little robot girl smiling and saying /the future/ in the underrated movie /Tomorrowland/.
It’s shiny and all techno and so it seems unfamiliar in our world of woodgrain-particleboard furniture and rocks and trees and things, but this is a very close representation of the social system we have now and how we got it.
Yellow in the center is the sun. Earth is the third green blob out from the sun. White flashes are freshly discovered and plotted asteroids. Persistent green pixels are then/now-known asteroids. Red pixels are asteroids that swing through the inner system, where we are. I started you where it gets interesting, where the search became serious. (Fullscreen this and turn the quality up as high as it works on your system.) (Click on the gear, low right.)
They were there for 41 days, and it looks exactly like you expected it to look. Also somehow they ruined the septic system. What a bunch of dildos.
Michele Bachman off her meds again, again.
Pop quotery meets fine art.
A comedy education.
There’s an article in the current New Yorker magazine about this girl who on YouTube, at 16 years of age, picked up 420 pounds like it was a suitcase.
So in some ways microphones can be a lot like wine, then. Where even the experts can’t tell the difference between a $400 bottle and a $9 one. There really is no excuse for a new microphone to cost more than a couple hundred dollars, unless it’s made of gold and encrusted with precious gems.
Scott Peterson’s latest Mendopia video cartoon.
Highway to Hell.
Leonardo diCaprio had to eat a whole raw bison liver to be in a movie, and now he wants everyone to watch this four-minute video. He said, “The bad part is the membrane around it. It’s like a balloon. When you bite into it, it bursts in your mouth.” The video isn’t about that, though. It’s about how billions of people eating meat are ruining the planet.
Pregnant male seahorse hip-sneezing out 2,000 baby seahorses from his Goa’uld incubator pouch. SFW.
Six and a half magic hours.
Clockwork Lego Laputa.
Next door to the fancy modern stadium in the /ha ha/ third-world communist hellhole. Oh, wait.
Overdosed on Nietzche.
Evolution of Superman in teevee and film.
Whereas, except for the 1974 one who looked like Julie in The Mod Squad, Wonder Woman was Wonder Woman pretty much right out of the box.
The Marxophone. (Demonstrated by Katherine Rhoda.) I’d skip to about 1:30. It’s a zither with a bunch of springy hammers for keyboard keys.
Here’s another one.
Ladies and gentlemen, the stupidest man in the House of Representatives, Louie Gohmert. Here he argues that Madame Curie would not have saved millions of lives by winning the Nobel Peace Prize for Radiation if girls could get ahead in business like boys.
Live-cam of an autonomous virtual deer wandering around in the GTA IV world.
Single comic book panels funny in or out of context.
In case you like to look at and learn about parrots.
Enjoy the photography project of this medical poseuse.
How to do all this stuff: tend a boiler, name parts of a buggy, wave your hands, wish for gold, etc.
A lovely story about all the things she lost, illustrated by animating all the things she lost.
GIFs of how things work. It might take awhile for this page to load.
All the Mythbusters’ results in one place.
Number 13 = Andorian furry.
How to make a bow and arrows when you live in a mud house and all you have is a hatchet made from a rock and a stick. (This comes after how to make a mud house and a hatchet when all you have is a pair of shorts a forest.)
Choose male or female, pull the slider to your age, click on fast, and watch the distribution develop.
It’s official, then: HDR has entirely taken over the field…
Why not just be honest about it? When we have replacement eyes and have control over the way we see, this will become the default setting.
“Words don’t have to mean anything to be funny. Pre-eclampsia. Say it.”
Here’s the recording of last night’s (2016-03-18) KNYO (and, three hours in, also KMEC) Memo of the Air: Good Night Radio show ready to download and keep. (Recently MediaFire changed things so you can’t any longer just click on Listen and start listening immediately. You can still click on Download and download the file and listen to it then. It’s actually been better all along to do it that way. I’m just letting you know so you don’t get there and go /What? Differerent! Aaaaugh!/ and flee without the great free thing you came for, that you deserve to have and enjoy, because you are a good person, and you don’t ever have to worry that you aren’t appreciated, because people appreciate you.) (I remember I had a new neighbor once, back when I lived in Caspar, who had little notes that sounded just like that, except without the part about MediaFire, made with an old-style Dymo label-maker in all the different colors of thick plastic strips they used to come in, and stuck all over the inside of her car, and one day in the shared driveway I noticed it aloud and she looked daggers at me, jumped in, peeled out and sped away.) (When I was little my favorite toy –besides books, and my sit-in car-house, and Supsups the rat-size raggedy bear-sheep-thing– was a Dymo labelmaker. But you never have time to explain things like that when someone’s already mad at you. Meaning me; you’re the one people appreciate.)
Molly B and John, newlyweds freshly back from their triumphant honeymoon theatrical tour of Costa Rica, hobnobbing with the great and the near-great and performing before the crowned heads of the Central American Riviera, showed up at the station and we sat around and talked for two hours, and Molly read her stories and poetry. John’s a fine-arts photographer and you might know Molly from her poetic announcements on the MCN Announce listserv. She has a calm, natural presence and I think she’s going have a show of her own soon on KNYO. Meanwhile, John has a show of his photography just a couple of storefronts north. Stop by.
Ernst Chladni’s eponymous figures.
The new economy.
Name of the year competition. Voting starts soon.
Life eats life. That’s how it works.
Ylvis – The Language of Love.
Donald Trump says China.
Here’s how a simple eclipse –and there is very little simpler than a solar eclipse– affects a man who knows what it is and what’s happening, and who’s going 600 miles an hour five miles up in the sky, sitting in a comfy room with about 200 other people, recording the event with a thing in his hand that also shares it nearly instantly with anyone in the world who wants to see. A sophisticated modern man. And he can barely contain himself, he’s so awed and delighted. I think that’s good.
“As you can see. Ha ha ha! Only the long beautiful legs have survived the –ha ha!– mayhem.”
Chainsaw. Ladder against branch he’s cutting. What could go wrong?
There. All better.
The rocket. Solid and liquid propellent motors. Very simple machine.
An even simpler machine.
What the different stupid piercings says about you.
This house has people in it.
The first ever I Love Lucy episode, lost, found and repaired.
“Bow to Him. Bow to your God of Yarn and Sticks.”
(Be sure to scroll down to The View-Master.) (And somehow avoid the one about unwanted thoughts. Ugh.)
Don’t you wish you were as fascinated and happy with /anything/ as this man is pleased with this are-you-kidding-me-expensive toy he bought.
Stunning new view of the Milky Way.
And a Deadpool visual effects breakdown. /I’m/ ready for the sequels.
“You know, I go to the theatre to be entertained. I don’t want to see plays about rape, sodomy and drug addiction. I can get all that at home.” –Peter Cook
Here’s the recording of last night’s (2016-03-11) KNYO (and, three hours in, also KMEC) Memo of the Air: Good Night Radio show ready to download and keep or just play with one click. (If that ever doesn’t work right for you I wish you’d comment and let me know. I might be able to help. I might not, but, you know, you never know; that’s what Watergate and the ’60s and stuff have taught us.)
Mars from orbit. Tom Tetzlaff sent this link.
An unusual bump. Better get that looked at.
You like classic jazz? Here are hundreds of hours of it, all organized and ready to download, free.
Another fetching wood-frame three-wheeler from Morgan. It’s a little pricey and no good in the mud, but put a couple of solar panels on the garage and you’ll never again need to buy gas or change the oil or change a serpentine belt or get a tuneup. It’s light, so the tires last nearly forever, too. Just don’t hit a deer with it.
…Nor add a flammable hat and expect it to fly, Constantinos Vlachos, you poor scorched Depression-era man.
The legacy of Bitchin’ Betty. “Roll right! Roll right!”
The iMom. (14 min.)
The trouble with the transporter.
Brits with dashcams, swearing at people who can’t hear them. The repetition becomes strangely soothing as the frightening traffic events lose their capacity to shock. In real life I /startle/ at every interruption of my internal examination of past mistakes and rehearsal of future ones. Maybe something like this will help someone like me. Or you. Also, there a kind of poetry to the swearing, especially the heartfelt breathy crooned passages. “Fucking hell. Jesus wept. Hoy. Oh. Whew.”
(The difference between a collection of clips like that from Britain and one from Russia is like day and night. Russians don’t raise their voices against the other driver. They all seem to swear gently to themselves in a resigned tone.) (This reminds me of Louis C.K. talking about God coming back and questioning man about the mess we’ve made of everything, especially with oil. “Why did you take it out of the fucking ground?” “‘Cause I wanted to go /faster/.” That’s the problem; its only very late in our evolution as creatures that we’ve been able to go as fast as /thirty miles an hour/. That’s too fast.)
The Brainwashing of My Dad. (The film trailer.)
Two ways. Can you think of a third and fourth way?
An eye for an eye.
And notice how pleased with his behavior his family, sitting with him, is. People like this get to vote, and have driver’s licenses…
What if: Darth JarJar.
If you’re blue and you don’t know where to go to.
If you already have a phone, you almost have a cool video microscope.
Right-arrow through 3900 pages of Klee’s notebooks. Klee, squee!
That’s right, little Syrian refugee children, this is what the New World is all about. I don’t see Paedo-bear anywhere, but there’s furry BirdMan from /Rick and Morty/.
Taxi visor cam captures fastest robbery and arrest in history.
Look at how many things we threw up.
Balloony. Bagan. Begorrah.
Painter Robert Ross sent this link about beautiful things in nature that we normally can’t see because we’re too big or too small or we live too fast or too slowly.
So you ask a guy with black-lacquered fingernails a simple question about his ray gun sound, and it turns into this whole, like, thing.
So which is it– Mary or Gary? Ancient art, rough diamonds, and so on.
“Can’t say I believed her.”
“I hope you understood our play. I know /I/ did, and I’m a fuckin’ nine-year-old girl!”
Tips for assassinating someone, from the 1953 CIA short manual on the subject. Full-screen it and page through it. You might get some ideas.
Why you can never have a lightsaber.
History of rock in fifteen minutes.
Orkestra Obsolete plays New Order’s /Blue Monday/ using only instruments available in the 1930s: theremin, a musical saw, a hammer dulcimer, a zither, and wine glasses.
The market economy, with Slavoj Zizek.
I got “Sexy and fun, but lonely.” What did you get?
Ad guys spitball how to market to women.
Sex bomb, with Yevgeny Plushenko.
Music video of realistic computer-generated alien landscapes.
An interesting article about mass hysteria. A lot of clicking and paging through, but worth it.
And some good advice to consider in the ridiculously unlikely event of an office or school shooter. Such as: “Keep comfy shoes under your desk so you don’t have to run away in uncomfortable shoes.” Here’s a question: Why should uncomfortable shoes even exist? What kind of an idiot would pay money for uncomfortable shoes?
Last night I set up a new portable-radio-studio computer and tested the fix for the internet streaming problem I had last week. I played random pieces from my music library for an hour and a half on KNYO. Maria Muldaur and Bessie Mae Smith and Lord Buckley and a bunch more. Brigitte Bardot whisper-singing /Bonjour Le Twat Toujours/. Jonathan Coulton. Billie Holiday. Judy Henske. Annabella Lwin. Strongbad. Some rousing musical theater. Etc.
It’s available for download for a little while before I delete it. And it’s in stereophonic sound. I’m experimenting with using stereo; it’s a cheesy gimmick, but I understand it’s becoming popular among the young people.
“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.” (Easy for Ralph Waldo Emerson to say.)
That recording was made on my end of the chain, so it’s complete and unbroken. For the first forty minutes of the show the connection via the web to the transmitter was switching on and off like, um– I say /like a crazy monkey/ too much, so let’s say it was going on and off like a neon sign on the blink. I put on a fifteen minute recording of Orson Welles excoriating not just a bad but an evil Southern police chief who literally beat the eyes out of a black soldier returning from the war, and while that ran I called Bob Young, and Bob turned the buffer time up at the transmitter end and that helped; it stayed on for the rest of the night. I’m looking at the failure log now, and I see that most of the problem must have been the internet service on my end, at Juanita’s house. Time to call for that excellent tech support Sonic is famous for. Tomorrow, which technically is today, but I’m going to bed now; I’m wiped out.
Multi-term county supervisor Norman duVall called and talked about the campaign to make Mendocino a charter county. Later Mitch called, distraught about what he saw as Bernie Sanders’ flame-out and impending tailspin. Trump and Hillary are both bad choices for president. Trump insanely bad, of course. But Hillary, yeesh.
A lot of funny material too.
The solution to identityship.
Machinery of joy.
A metaphor for life.
In the AVA, Rob Anderson seemed to imply Donald Trump is like this guy. I /kind of/ see it.
But I also see this.
“No roaches were harmed in this video because they couldn’t be.”
Drumpf. Be proud of your heritage. (20 minutes. /So/ worth it.)
Contrast and compare.
It was a popular magazine. A magazine was a stack of slippery paper all stuck together on one edge.
Reclaimed wood project with Stop-0-Mation.
“You don’t want no part o’ this shit, Dewey.”
Lovely map of Mars. Click on it to enbiggify.
“May live to see.”
Robert Ross sent this link. The future of sushi transportation.
Beautiful silver airplanes.
An ad for a new kind of apparently sentient tire based on the Borg Sphere.
Click through slideshow of handmade art bicycles. Some are all like /whoa/, some are all like /huh?/ and some are all like /hmm/.
Hydrophobia for sand.
Cuts and transitions 101.
Hydrophobia for dog. “Just FYI, that’s what it looks like.”
Bottlebrush dog hates red-light-butt robot dog.
The way it works.
Full-length BBC documentary about that murderous rotten rat bastart Henry Kissinger.
Oscar Ramos’ glossy distress/conflict art.
“I need a Bogle for the Glotch.” “Don’t make us kiss now.”
Is it okay to torture a robot?
Why do you suppose that in video of this sort of thing the camera person always bursts out laughing? I think that’s a subject for research.
So, not a real doctor, then?
The first sound film ever.
A taste of these people’s fire films.
Who’s a clever eel? /You/ are! /You’re/ a clever eel.
A taste of a new /painted animation/ film.
Secret society art.
C’mon, now. Who’s sorriest here?
Circle of Abstract Ritual.
Explains a lot.
Big tears in the fabric of the universe.
And self-referential advice for the writer.
“I think we are well advised to keep on nodding terms with the people we used to be, whether we find them attractive company or not. Otherwise they turn up unannounced and surprise us, come hammering on the mind’s door at 4 A.M. of a bad night and demand to know who deserted them, who betrayed them, who is going to make amends.” –Joan Didion
Equipment problems prevented starting on time, but Bob Young showed up and made a fricking satellite phone out of an umbrella and a Speak-N-Spell, and by 9:30 I stumbled into the air. And after a couple of minutes of getting used to weightlessness it went pretty well. Mitch Clogg and Elly Cooney came in and Mitch read from his new book. Alex called much later and talked about film. I think you’ll like it.
Again, I want to recommend the teevee series /Jessica Jones/. She’s adapted from the Marvel character. She’s a self-loathing alcoholic private detective with a low-rent superpower (strength) and a reasonable explanation for the self-loathing part of it. The villain is played by everyone’s favorite Doctor, David Tennant. All the peripheral characters are required; I especially draw your attention to the red-haired woman who lives upstairs. The year of shows are all one story– no episode stands on its own; start from the beginning.
Weightless but not tireless elephants.
The founding fathers take off their belts.
The 2016 World Church-Supplies Expo.
I don’t know how to think about this. I’m happy she’s having a fun time, and I’m happy tech has got to this point, but– ramifications. And, see, on the other hand, my mother started teaching me to read as I was learning to talk, so storybooks were like this to me, and maybe this is the new storybook. It won’t always be a giant mask/hat; it’ll be contact lenses and/or implants powered by blood and body heat. And everyone will get used to the new way, like we’ve gotten used to people in the line at the grocery store shouting in your face while he’s really talking to someone a hundred miles away, or a person on a street corner explaining something to the air. They might be crazy, or not, and it has nothing to do with us, so.
Young man with Asperger’s on acid. A documentary.
Learn the stroke symptoms from this musical doctor.
The precautionary principle.
Bringing yourself down to a dog’s level just confuses the dog.
“They want prisoners to vote. They’ve taken all our fish and money through the years.”
What’s inside a big $700 battery? A little $30 battery and a sponge to keep it from sliding around in there.
Time is broken. This man shows you how to fix it. Pay attention.
The U.S. has gone fucking mad.
How a match works. In slow motion.
How long drugs stay detectable in your blood.
“This is the greasiest crane I’ve ever been on.”
Lateral movement in film.
Space Oddity on gayageum.
Live performance on high-school-kid-made synth projects.
I understand you like to look at pictures.
And you appreciate technical-minded artistic genius. Which this is.
“Now, an ignorant person, that’s someone who doesn’t know whatever you have just found out.” –Will Rogers
A little over an hour in, Stuart Cohen came by and talked and sang and played guitar for maybe an hour and ten, and then Alex called from a parked car in San Diego and that went on for awhile. But I stayed until after 4am and ended up reading almost everything I brought to read, anyway, so it’s kind of an experiment in doing things a little differently and seeing how it turns out. One thing I learned, something I have to learn over and over again, apparently, is the importance of checking everything before I start at all; as the show goes out from the studio to the transmitter(s) I record it at the source, where I am, by running a line from the headphone output of the monitor amp to my old video camera. And someone before me in the studio had left the amp’s tone and balance controls cocked oddly –who knows why?– so afterward, today, I had to repair that so I wouldn’t sound like someone talking through a pillow, and I took the opportunity to replace the music I’d played in the first hour with the clean music files (Louis Prima, Thomas Dolby).
Oh, and when I was talking with Alex, when he read his new story I turned my microphone off so not to interfere, and then when we were talking again I forgot to turn it back on (!), and during that time my voice was picked up only thinly but piercingly by the telephone, so for more than a half hour there it sounds more like /I’m/ the one calling in. No great harm done, but then Alex and I hung up, and over a minute of real-time dead air resulted when I was sitting there blathering about Sophie Madeleine and her project and introducing her music. (I cut the dead space out of the recording.) It ain’t the end of the world, but it’s embarrassing. I always get a schadenfreudistic kick out of examples of the incompetence of other radio people, so I suppose it’s only fair to return the favor.
So! Download the show and enjoy it, I hope. And also here are links to a few not necessarily radio-useful but really worthwhile items that I happened upon while putting the show together, found mostly thanks to the fine websites listed to your right.
Year of the Fire Monkey gala.
A personal relationship.
A horrifyingly bad charter-school teacher is recorded by an I hope horrified assistant teacher. What strikes me is: the object of the teacher’s wrath seems used to being berated and barked at, she just complies, and the others just go forward as though nothing happened. Teaching to the test turns school into a kind of boot camp.
Aerial view of sheepherding.
“I felt like I’d gotten the keys to the kingdom.”
Who they lived at the same time as. (Scroll up, down and sideways.) (Though, go back more than about 500 years and you might as well stay /up/.) (And look at that– checkbox only religion and history seems to be glutted with popes.) (And you can click on any of the people and read the Wikipedia article about them.)
A chart of who marries whom. (Mouse-over it to see the connections.)
A satisfying video.
Sad Jeb. (Includes “Please clap.”)
The real song of the sewer. Not the funny Art Carney one.
“If there’s a hero in this story, it’s going to be [the wedding videographer].”
How to deal with telegram bullying.
And 6 years on the sun in 6 minutes. The explanations and close-ups start at 2:50.
“A woman told police that men were living in her attic and that their poop was running down the walls into her first-floor bathroom. She also said the bathroom mirror was double-sided and that the attic men were using it to spy on her, and she showed officers a piano that she said her niece would climb into when she wanted to teleport to the attic.” –Charleston City Paper
I want to show you this first off, for obvious reasons: The world will end this Sunday. Get your affairs in order.
Spring in the universe. Time-space in the spring. Another thing it turns out Mister Smartypants Einstein was right about.
Going down. It bugs me that he doesn’t close his left thumb around the rung. 920 feet, rusty, rickety ladder, no safety cage most of the way.
That reminds me of the short story /The Vertical Ladder/. That made a huge impression on me when I was a boy. You can read it –um, hold on– here:
A tour of the garden of earthly delights. Guided or wandering; it’s up to you.
How comfortable are you with uncertainty?
“I should have killed you when I had the chance.”
Another way of looking at history.
Mitchel and Webb: conspiracy theories.
Evil smiling. I can think of a few they missed.
“What a bunch of bumbling fucktards these guys are. They only want to run the country, though, so no big deal.” –Xeni Jardin
Hit by a bus.
James Joyce: “Darling, do not be offended at what I wrote.”
Lenore Skenazy makes good sense.
Skiing while swinging a camera around your head on a string.
Our sun, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and His Noodly Appendages.
Phone recording of having your house struck by just a glancing blow from a tornado.
A triumphant paper airplane.
The movers. “Stop draggin’, ya bastard!”
Why people visit the emergency room. An interactive chart. (Mouse-over it.)
“Antelope Freeway 1/2 Mile… Antelope Freeway 1/4 Mile… Antelope Freeway 1/8 Mile… Antelope Freeway 1/16 Mile…”
Craig S. Caplan’s Traveling Salesman Problem art.
/Digital/ video feedback. Read the full explanation.
The last analog music tape duping company.
It may take awhile to load and move smoothly, but– which direction is she spinning?
Aaaaaah! (or) A day at the beach.
LSD and hotdogs don’t mix. (A film produced by Lockheed.)
I don’t see what the problem is, here. All they have to do is say on the menu that it’s lobster and other lobster-like substances– cheese, for example. Then it doesn’t make you a big liar when it turns out its just cheese with a few molecules of lobster juice in it, like when you open a can of pork and beans and it’s beans and beans with a cubic centimeter chunk of pork fat.
Sid Caesar’s bizarre secret.
A neat game. Just click on things until you figure out how each part works. And when people and creatures ask you questions, answer them to get gas in your balloon to go to the next place.
A sped-up lightning storm seen from outer space. (The top image is video to click on, to play it.)
“You’re all being fired so the company can continue to pay me to stand here and fire you. Thank you for for your attention. Okay, quiet down! Quiet down! This is important information, and other people want to hear it if you don’t. This isn’t personal; it’s a business decision.”
The Monkees. They were pretty darn good.
At last, a new device to bob a child’s ears and hair at the same time, in a perfect straight line, at home.
The tell-tale thighs of a Soviet test cheater!
(!) OK GO rented a Russian airliner to film a music video in like two dozen 30-second real weightless-diving-flying takes artfully digitally stitched together.
Daisy Ridley’s stunt double demonstrates pipe dancing.
“Na tha’ yer sports, lad. None o’ yer fightin’ fer a toy balloon.” (Meaning, tree-throwing is much more manly than American football.)
“We’ll be greeted as liberators.”
“Workers use a forklift to test the strength of a new doll’s head.”
Sherp, not, as you’d think, the Fifth Stooge, but rather a crop-smashing, swamp-vegetation-shredding, 3-miles-per-gallon behemoth to drive the kids to post-apocalyptic soccer practice in. And it can be defeated only by a determined opponent sneaking up from the side and tipping it over.
Are you left-brained or right-brained. (It says I am left-brained by 63 over 37.)
Galaxy of covers.
Short Russian film about astronaut friends. (15 min.)
Turn the endangered sounds on and off by clicking on the images.
On The Air Magazine, February, 1926. (This may take awhile to load. It’s the whole magazine as a pdf file.)
A complete webcomic about Midnight Radio by Ehud Lavski. (Scroll down.)
Bass and Google Translate.
“It’s a fascinating question, which I was just discussing with my good friend, Dr. Henry Kissinger.”
The gallery of Woman In Diner Ignoring Carly Fiorina Campaigning So Close Behind Her She Could Poke Her In The Eye Just By Raising Her Fork.
And the Grand Tour.
“Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.” –Joe Theismann, ESPN
“The zebra is an animal that easily panics,” said Yumi Tamura, 27, who dressed as the zebra but usually cares for gorillas and monkeys. “I myself felt panicky when acting it out,” she told reporters.
Sandy Glickfeld came by but was too shy to speak, so you may only psychically sense her presence, but that’s better than nothing. Stuart Cohen brought his guitar and played a few new songs, where the mic was in just the right place and the sound quality is excellent. I’ll be cutting those out and putting them in my music library to play in future. A pretty good show. I think you’ll like it.
“Eet ees a styupit game,” comes from Jim Jarmusch’s black-and-white film /Stranger than Paradise/. A Hungarian girl’s life is turned upside-down and she goes to America to stay in a bleak apartment in a bleak winter American city with her bleak cousin. He’s watching football on a teevee on the folding table. She looks at it for a little while and declares it styupit. (This is before we knew that football causes brain damage, and that it’s especially dangerous for schoolkids’ brains.) (As well as for their health in other ways. I knew Larry Weldon, the world-class watercolorist; he lived next door when I was in high school. His school-age football injury in the 1940s required him to use braces on his legs and braced crutches to walk and caused him pain all the rest of his life.)
Anyway, here are links to a few not necessarily radio-useful but really worthwhile items that I happened upon while putting the show together, found mostly thanks to the fine websites listed to your right.
Zebras can’t be draft animals, they said. It won’t work, they said.
A comprehensive history of Japan in nine minutes.
Drone video of the results of letting people get rich selling ingredients for war, instead of putting them in prison for getting rich that way.
Time-lapse shot of ice on Lake Michigan.
Test for what kind of dog you are. (It says I’m a poodle.)
The refugees’ trip, in text, sound and short videos.
3-D craters and features of Ceres, based on images from spacecraft flybys. (Turn the quality up as high as your system can play it.)
Half an hour. An interesting story, if you have the attention span people used to have even ten years ago. Nuance. Surprise. Lies and justifications. And a puzzle: I for one would like it if people didn’t carry guns around everywhere, but I also don’t like the way these cops conspired in secret (they thought) to make up a bunch of charges to stick the guy with. And I for sure don’t like suspicionless traffic stops. There’s a fine line between pulling people over just to see if there’s something they can arrest and/or harrass you for (and, lately, confiscate all your money and use it to buy the station a margarita machine) and –I’m trying not to say it– Nazi Germany. A fine line.
Speaking of which: “Stop resisting! Stop resisting!” Bad cops. (First, silent security cam video, then the cops’ body cam video with sound.)
Star Wars as a grindhouse film trailer.
Exercise your face. Keep pumpin’ that nose, now. Keep it up. Keep pumpin’. Eep eep eep eep eep eep eep eep! And relax.
Crouching dragon, slinky(tm) tiger.
Alexa. Weather, music, spelling advice, murder.
French frisbee-throwing machine.
Where the bullets go.
“Once the senators who oversee the science committee see this graph, they will pass a law forbidding Miss America to be over the age of 12.”
http://www.tylervigen.com/spurious-correlations (and scroll down)
Yes. Nearly all the time.
Wallpaper for your appliances.
Such a cool thing to do– but of course now he is cursed. There’s always a trade-off.
We all go around in clouds of each other’s personal bacteria.
He hates Lord of the Rings, not because anything’s wrong with it as a story, but because it’s just like his real life. And he recognizes that Sam is the indispensible character, not Frodo.
A more interesting future than the one we actually got.
Tips from the whistler. Example: “Kissing makes your lips mooshy. Never kiss before a performance.”
The view from various places aboard a sinking ship– all the way to the bottom. With sound.
And the first honest cable company ad ever.
“I am not a conjuror of cheap tricks! I’m trying to help you.” –Gandalf
No new Memo show tonight on KNYO or KMEC, but the rerun of last week’s, because of pesky internet problems at Juanita’s, where I’ll be for the next few days. I could explain the details, but what would be the point? Next week (2016-02-05) I’ll be doing the show from the normal place –KNYO’s storefront at 325 N. Franklin in Fort Bragg, next to the Tip Top bar, in case you want to come by then and just walk in and show off your musical chops or talk about your project or whatever, and that’ll give me two weeks to harass the communicatorium at Juanita’s so it’s reliable again.
Okay, I’m a compulsive ‘splainer; it’s that Juanita has DSL service through Sonic.net, but ATT maintains the lines and the cable, which have been fixed and then failed and fixed and failed again. They say it’s the rain, but it rains in South Korea more than it rains here, and even pet parakeets in Korea have rock-reliable gigabit internet. /Lithuania/ has fast reliable cheap internet. I don’t like anything about Comcast, and satellite internet service is nearly useless even when it’s working at its best, so the obvious choice is to get so-called Fusion service from Sonic, which provides both internet and phone under one surprisingly reduced bill, and free long distance, and they guarantee personal attention to a quick fix when something goes wrong, unlike when /I/ call ATT (and wade through the robot phone tree and the support woman on the phone says the problem is all over Northern California (really?) so they can get on it like next Saturday. (“That’s not acceptable. I need it for my work. Can you fix it by Friday?” and the woman says, “The earliest we can schedule service after Saturday is the following Monday. Do you want to reschedule?”) (What? No.) (And I get off the [staticky] phone, go to take the trash out, and there’s an ATT truck guy out there right now digging in the apartment block’s phone box to try to solve my next-door neighbor’s problem. I’m like, “While you’re right there, can you look at mine?” And he’s like, “No, but I don’t have to. This isn’t where the problem is.” And Juanita’s on break from work and she’s just walked up, and she says, “They told us last week that it’s in the cable.” And the man smiles sadly and says, “I know. I don’t have anything to do with that part of it. I’m the man who comes /here/.”) Well, I respect that. They also serve who come /here/.
Anyway, I could do the show tonight from Starbucks, I suppose, or from the McDonalds in Walmart, or from Juanita’s mother’s house– that might be a neat experiment– but no.
The service as it is at Juanita’s has become just bad enough to not at all be able to reliably stream audio out (by Net Uptime Monitor log, and by the orange failure light on the router, ten fails in less than half an hour, one of them almost two minutes long), but it’s been possible to use it in a herky-jerky fashion to assemble my show, and I have the usual amount of not-necessarily-radio-useful material left over, so here’s what I’m gonna do for you: here are links to several hours of rainy-day or rainy-night things to look at and play with and learn about, that I found mostly thanks to the fine websites listed to your right. Have fun and enjoy yourself, and I’ll get back to you next week.
A satisfying explanation of the main problem most people have with the speed of light. Don’t tell me you’ve never had a problem with the speed of light. I don’t believe you.
Who doesn’t like to watch horses running in slow motion?
…or watch an angry childish tantrum-thrower who has sworn on teevee to kill any officer who tries to arrest him fleeing at too high a speed to keep from crashing, then reaching twice for his gun when ordered to keep his hands in sight, then being killed with one shot, knowing that his disciples will claim that he was gunned down in cold blood peacefully surrendering with his hands up, so they can all continue to goad each other into stupidly vandalizing park buildings and call it patriotism? (I set the video to start where the relevant action starts.) (Careen, crash, suicide/martyrdom by cop.)
Speaking of which: A demented obese haka for ranchers’ rights.
How many mass-extinctions have there been?
Robot dino-porn came before tentacle porn. “Counterweights easily move to balance head when girl is seized.” “Sponge rubber teeth, lips, and tongue.”
What is your amateur porn telling employers about you?
Popular music on traditional East Asian instruments. This is a rapidly expanding genre, for good reason.
Light saber violin bows.
Why to be careful at the ocean. (I saw this in Lost Coast Outpost.)
This boy won a round of Guitar Hero, uploaded it. It was taken down for copyright violation (the music). Still, proud of his accomplishment, he dubbed his own bipping and humming instead. (Press CC to turn on the YouTube computer caption generator’s idea of what he’s saying.)
Peter Serafinowicz replaced Trump speech word for word but in a Cockney accent, and it turns him into an avuncular Brit gangleader-type standup comic. No more presidential but listenable and self-sarcastically funny and almost a sympathetic character.
The White Room.
The blue, red, yellow, white, orange, and green 17x17x17 Rubik’s cube.
Robot solves normal Rubic’s cube in 1 second.
“P.C. culture attacked me by pointing out how racist I am.”
Nancy Grace, the Torquemada of tertiary cable talk. “Actually, Nancy, we just– have to get to the weather.”
Prom photos from a far magicker world that we have lost and that is no more. On the other hand, when’s the last time you collapsed in a fit of coughing and wheezing because of the stench of hairspray? And, yes, that’s how you spell magicker.
The way the world looked in the 1970s…
…when children wrote letters like these to the future:
College can and should be free.
How we get wisdom.
Mend and make do.
Historically accurate Native American bathing suits.
The future of advertising: advertising in dreams.
A history of London made of paper.
What if Flint’s water problem happened to rich people?
End game: frustration and despair.
Old movie dance clips cut to Uptown Funk.
The slighly earlier similar project.
Dizzy from artisanal pot. Rather, vase.
Patient and steady improvements in the technology of fire.
A flashlight that shoots tanglefoot nets.
…which might also be useful against a pop star who is in denial about her Vole American status.
An interview with God.
Metachaos. (Disturbing, but definitely art.)
The true story of why you might have heard Andy Warhol referred to as Drella.
Traditional ceremony for a traditional wedding between a quietly astounded man and an at first crying then barking and shrieking woman. If the man hung on through this wedding, I think they have a chance. And if the woman isn’t participating in the haka, but rather trying to get them all to stop, then they /really/ have a chance, because it’s good to stick up for yourself.
Cheap webcam and baby monitor security is so bad, there’s a search engine for looking at random parking lots and lobbies and restrooms and babies’ bedrooms.
Sword of Damocles Estates. From the air.
An accurate summary of the Israeli/Palestinian conflict, though in unnecessarily vertiginous animation.
The Arabesque spirograph of Earth and Venus.
Oh, it’s so on.
Stay cool, Bret. Bret, stay cool. (“I’ll bet you’ll regret you ever met Bret and the Tough Brets.”)
And a plateau of calm water-pump windmills. They’re made of sails.
“Once he’d carried her to the bed, he lifted her nightgown and moved down between her legs and lapped at the spiced copper there until, across the quivering swell of her belly and breasts he saw the flush leap into her throat, her hands twisting the sheets by her head.” –Garth Risk Hallberg
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon with lightsabers. The best of both galaxies.
Magnetic arches on the sun.
Just a really sloooooooow avalanche. The videographer finds it funny. He’s probably thinking about the youth-in-service kids who’ll have to clear it off the road, and remembering his own service and the fun he had there, before all this adulthood and responsibility.
First jazz album by man who hates jazz and can’t even play the piano.
Brick in a dryer on a trampoline. Which is a pretty good visualization of the lousy kind of impressionistic nonsense jazz, to me.
New type of prosthetic arm. Promising.
New type of record player.
You know the drill.
Electrified fork makes food taste better. I am gonna make one of those and try it.
They see me rollin’, part 2.
We can dub it in later.
The Snape story-arc bits in order.
Rosa explains capitalism.
The difference between a crazy person and a moral pillar of society.
My cowshed is fresh. Byitch.
Our many mostly proudly libtard presidents.
The future of the club scene. In space. (Aufgedeinenblitzenderfeunergescheistenpflantz.)
A cup of coffee. A warning against rushing to judgment. (She’s not the Whore of Babylon, after all. The coffee is for someone else.)
Identical apartments, different people. Which one is you? I’ll bet it’s 6th floor.
Printed filth causes rape and murder. Sex-mad magazines are creating criminals faster than we can build jails to lock them up in. “A racket that’s vicious enough to pervert an entire generation of American kids!” (27 min.)
Wave your mouse left and right over the photos for before-and-after.
Pre-modern-civilization matriarchal one-with-Mother-Gaia peace, man.
Newly found giant planet of our Sun.
Better maps of the bottom of the sea.
2016 is going to be a disastrous year for the Greenland ice sheet.
How the carnival casino tricks you.
The carnival casino writ large.
Detective Skip Tobey in /The Deceptive Demise of Sir Remington-Smyth!
And a slideshow of bitchin’ tractors. Lovely machines and the men (and women) who care for them.